Friendship in Marriage

"It's not the lack of love, but the lack of friendship that makes many marriages unhappy."
— Friedrich Nietzsche

The power of friendship in a relationship can't be overestimated. You may know you can rely on your partner for anything, but it's important to like each other, too. So put the same amount of effort into your spouse as you give to your friends — funny e-mails, impromptu dinners, all of it.

(Quote taken from Dr. Laura Berman)

Blame

"Blame is one of the surest ways to STAY IN A PROBLEM! In blaming another, we GIVE AWAY our power. Understanding (blame) enables us to rise above the issue and take control of our future."

It is true that many people have said or done something in our lives to hurt us or to cause us grief. It is true that many times we may not even be at fault.....well, maybe not total fault!!

Either way, we cannot change the past and we cannot control others. Those terrible things that caused you so much pain will only continue to make you miserable of you don't let them go and stop blaming others for your problems.

Mothers and fathers will make mistakes. Your boss will too. Your spouse----well, that's a given!

It is our responsibility to be happy in our own lives, to accept the situation we are in, and to understand and learn from them. What would happen if instead of blaming your mother for the past 10 years because of a mistake she made, if you got to understand her and why she made the choice she did? As you show compassion to the person who wronged you, you begin to give YOURSELF the knowledge and power to set yourself FREE. "You can't free yourself until you free them. You can't forgive yourself until you forgive them, you will demand perfection from yourself, and you will be miserable all your life."

Have you held onto something too long and blamed someone else for your unhappiness?
Were you able to free yourself from the blame and pain?
If so, send us your story!

www.ContinualCare@gmail.com

It's YOUR life!!

Often times it feels as though our life is crashing down around you, that nothing is going right, and that you have no control over it.

Those moments usually is our mind and bodies way of saying, "it's time for a change!"

"This life is the only one you've got. They key to getting your life right lies, first, in recognizing that it's your life, and second, on accepting the fact that there's only one person who can define "right" for you: YOU!

Defining "right" and getting it "right" are the things that you can do to regain the lost control in your life. There is nothing "wrong" with you!" The feelings you are feeling are just signs that you have changed and you need some new tools for the new adventure you are about to begin. It's a process of self-discovery. It means, "you are stronger than you've ever been, whether you feel it yet or not."

Self Discipline

Are you good at being self-disciplined? If not, here are a few tips to help you get started.

1). Pick one area to be organized in. A desktop, a drawer, a shelf...one little area that you can be successful in keeping organized. As you manage the one space you will find that you will begin to expand the areas you are organized in. You will become more self-disciplined in picking up after yourself and keeping your space organized and neat.

2). Be on time. When a person is one time and not rushing in late to everything you will find yourself in a more calm state. Being self-disciplined means watching the clock and being on time.

3). Finish what you start. Practice with small tasks first. Example: if you empty all the waste baskets finish the job by actually taking it out to the trash bin. Pulling weeds? Finish the job by putting away the garden tools and disposing of the weeds. As you find small successes you will then be able to move into bigger projects.

Self discipline is like any other skill---it can be learned a little bit at a time. Pick one little thing and be a success at it and then add another. Don't be discouraged if you make a mistake, just start again, and keep trying. Never give up!

We would LOVE to here some of your tips, ideas, and suggestions on how you have found successful ways to be self-disciplined.

Quote

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

                                                ~Marianne Williamson

Loneliness

Are you feeling alone?
Feeling like there is no one to call with your good news?
No one to share your sadness with?

Some of us may be surrounded with people all the time and yet still feel lonely. Others may spend their time in solitude in which they didn't choose. Either way, loneliness can be painful.

Being human means at times we are going to feel a range of emotions and one of them is loneliness. All of us will experience it, all of us will fill it's pain and heart-ache.

So, what's the cure? It's a 2-step process.

1) Service. When you serve others you get lost in your work and not in your own problems. Everyone knows that whether you call it blessings or karma, that when you serve others you reap rewards. Serve your children, your neighbor, volunteer at the hospital, or elementary school. The simplest random act of kindness will fill your saddened heart with love.

2). Connect with your family. When you re-connect with family (or a "like-family" friend), you heal and you feel valued. If there have been problems, forgive old hurts, and let the past be in the past. If it is just a matter of loosing touch, reach out. We now live in a world full of technology. Use it! Call, email, instant-message, twitter, or even use snail-mail. Whatever you choose, connecting with your roots, your family, is where you will find your greatest happiness.

Want to share your "reach-out" success story? Email us!
www.continualcare@gmail.com

Fears

What are you afraid of?

Of course we are all afraid of certain things that scare us. All of us have fears. To some it may be the dark or spiders, while for others it is a fear of loosing their job. These fears create anxiety and are frustrating when we must face them.

But sometimes fear is good. Fears can motivate us to change, especially when we recognize that the fear may be irrational and paralyzing us. For example, you may be scared to ask for a promotion. When searching you discover the real fear is not that you might get turned down for the job, but that what would you do if you got it?

You know your life could change with a title after your name or a pay raise all for the better, but how would you handle it? What the real fear is not in applying for the job, but of success and happiness if you got the job. How silly is it to rob ourselves of our own personal growth and happiness?

What fear is holding you down today? What keeps you sitting on the couch day after day watching life go by on the tv instead of going outside and living it?

Do you have a fear that is paralyzing you? We would love to hear!!